Chapter 220, I’ve Been Patient Enough (2)

Translator: Hedge

Editor: Lizzz

 

[If I am to be honest, both of them are indeed my brothers. If I were to be harsh, neither of them are brothers. Right now, I just could not tell whether I should be honest or harsh.]

 

[I could not tell them that I was grateful they were thinking of me. I couldn’t ask them why they were arbitrarily hiding matters concerning me.]

 

With a heart that couldn’t laugh or get angry, Kalian looked at Plants and said.

 

‘It’s okay.’

 

Kalian  couldn’t get angry at Chase’s words, asking him to let it go in that voice that once asked him if he truly couldn’t yield on becoming a Knight, despite having already resigned himself to it. It was that same voice on that small beach which still remained in his memory, same as the scent he longed for.

 

He could not smile while looking at Plants, who wore an expression telling to either bark or bite, but in any case, not to ask more about it and just move on.

 

“In any case, please be careful. Don’t try to dig deeper and keep a close watch.”

 

So he only urged Chase once more like this.

 

To call it a slip of the tongue would be absurd, but in any case, it was Chase who had been caught by Kalian with something. He was not unaware of this fact, but even so, he could not press Chase further.

 

Knowing that Chase would engrave every single word of Kalian’s in his heart, knowing that no matter what he asked or how he asked it now, any words would only pierce Chase like an awl, he could not ask more.

 

“Sure”

 

Because Chase was younger than the current Kalian. Because what he had to bear would be too heavy to consider everything fine.

 

—I  need to somehow explain to Prince Kalian, but it’s not easy to do so.

 

—I understand. What you mean.

 

Where would Kalian be the only one to lose his usual composure in matters involving Debeullan? Chase would be more, not less, affected. To the extent that he could not gauge that Kalian would have mild doubts about what conversation he had with Debeullan and could not give a proper explanation or excuse for such mild doubts.

 

How unlike Chase this was.

 

—I just want to ask about that matter in detail…

 

—I will contact you again later.

 

Therefore, Kalian also uncharacteristically cut off Chase’s words. Chase, who had paused briefly, answered.

 

—I understand. We’ll talk again, Prince Kalian.

 

Chase said this, unable to add more words. Kalian ended the communication with an apology. Then he turned his head toward Plants.

 

“Don’t ask me more either.”

 

Plants, who saw the ring’s light go out as if telling him to listen, spoke once more. He had noticed that Kalian had ended the conversation without being able to question Chase. Of course, he had also noticed the intention to shake down Plants instead of Chase.

 

Kalian, who had been staring intently at Plants, opened his mouth in a quiet voice.

 

“Even though I haven’t listened to a single word from older brother Randel, I’m trying very hard to obediently follow what you say.”

 

Where could there be a more absurd statement than this?

 

But Plants did not frown or sneer.

 

The reason he could not laugh at the story about trying to listen well was that, though hard to believe, he knew those words were not lies. No matter how terrible his original personality had been, looking at Chase’s words and the occasional behaviors showing his old personality, he knew that Kalian had become quite rounded now.

 

“Older brother Randel tried to control me, but you tried to keep me in line. Knowing that, I also try quite hard.”

 

Rather than trying to dominate, Plants just tried to act as an older brother.

 

So regardless of other things, he had tried quite hard when dealing with Plants. Not only had he kept him alive without killing him, and though he had used his sword a bit, he had never disrespectfully thrown punches, and he had fed him well, and when told to sit he sat, and when told not to be stubborn he yielded, things like that.

 

Of course, there were small side effects like unintentionally frequenting the fourth floor as if it were his own room, or having more days of barking than speaking like a human, but anyway, wasn’t the important fact that he had made an effort? Surely.

 

“But I don’t think I can do that this time. I feel like I know what it is, but I don’t understand anything. So.”

 

But this time, he could not even try.

 

Because he felt he knew what words would come out. What the matter might be related to those two, who he could not define as brothers or not, were showing similar reactions while trying to hide. No, he felt he knew who it might be related to.

 

The light green pea who was busy enough to die just handling the aftermath of Kalian’s actions, and now looked set to handle the aftermath of some purple-eyed fellow living in some distant southern seaside village, let out a deep sigh.

 

“Kalian.”

 

“Yes.”

 

Plants, facing Kalian who had answered obediently, stared intently at the strawberry pieces and mint leaves in his teacup before continuing.

 

“If it’s something you need to know, the Crown Prince of Secritia will tell you. If it’s nothing significant, he would have already mentioned it. Can’t you just let it quietly pass?”

 

Kalian looked at Plants without answering.

 

Important content related to Bern that was not insignificant, yet that Kalian should not know.

 

It meant he would not tell him in the end.

 

How boldly he spoke, telling him not to try to know more, while arbitrarily interfering in Kalian’s affairs and hiding facts as he pleased.

 

“You nodded when Hina told you not to interfere in her affairs on your own, yet I don’t understand why you step forward so readily to interfere in my affairs.”

 

“I don’t think my little brother and I are any different.”

 

Plants retorted to Kalian, who was pointing out that contradiction.

 

Wasn’t it rather Kalian who more often arbitrarily interfered in Plants’s affairs, hid facts as he pleased, and told him not to try to know more? Of course, he was not unaware of how important that matter regarding the Crown Prince was to Kalian, but that did not change the fact that they were both doing the same thing.

 

“Whenever I tell you something, you always learn something unexpected along with it.”

 

“My little brother teaches me too well.”

 

Plants, who retorted without yielding at all, leaned back in his chair and slowly closed his eyes. Knowing that he made such a face when falling into thought, Kalian waited for Plants’s decision without other words.

 

“Why does my little brother insist on walking on broken glass?”

 

Though removing one less piece would not make much difference, he was saying this because Kalian was deliberately seeking out and stepping on the pieces that had been cleared away so he would step on at least one less.

 

“The reason I insist on stepping on it is…”

 

Kalian, who had laughed silently because he was reminded of Allan who had said similar words, nodded.

 

“To throw a tantrum when I meet Serenty.”

 

And then he answered with exactly that expression he made whenever he would not listen.

 

“I’ll accept everything given without refusing, and go through it all. Since only rain I cannot avoid is given every time, I’ll just get hit by all of it. So when I meet her later, I’ll repay everything I received in full. To do that, I need to receive more to repay more, don’t I? That’s why I do this. Because while I’m not good at holding grudges, I’m good at keeping accounts.”

 

[Ah. My brother is talking crazy again.]

 

“I’ll go mad.”

 

[Is it because he’s someone living a second life after passing away once, or because his life is extraordinary? Is that why? How can I possibly follow that extraordinarily mad thought process when it’s so extraordinary that I absolutely cannot keep up?]

 

[I should have just sent him with Chase when Chase returned. The crazy blue-haired Mage too, all bundled together, send his father too, send Kyrie too, send that ill-mannered attendant too, just pack them all up in one bundle and send them all away. While at it, bundle up older brother Randel too and tell them to drop him off in front of Tansyll on the way, and whether the Royal Palace suffocates or not, I should have just managed Cyries somehow by raising His Majesty with Luci.]

 

“I thought I was fortunate just because Hina, Kyrie, Ian, and Master were alive because of me, but it rained. After saving you too, I saved Cyries and Secritia, and to save this Continent of Shisterra as well, I need to live too, so I tried to live with that thought, but it rained. And so I couldn’t endure it anymore. I endured and endured but couldn’t endure anymore.”

 

[I’ve been patient enough. I really have been patient enough…]

 

“So I feel like I need to do even that to live. I want to live but feel like I need to make a reason to be able to live. I feel like I really need a reason now. That’s why I do this.”

 

“You’ll bark even in front of Serenty then.”

 

“That wouldn’t be bad either. In front of Serenty, woof, woof.”

 

Kalian, who retorted as if it were not a joke, saying he would certainly do it, grinned.

 

“Please tell me. I’m not as young as you, so it’s fine.”

 

Whatever that secret was, he would learn it someday anyway.

 

Whether he got rained on while walking one step ahead or got rained on one step behind, getting soaked in the rain was the same. If it was rain he had to face whenever it came, he would rather face it now and grit his teeth.

 

Plants let out another sigh.

 

It was a sigh of resignation.

 

“Crazy bastard.”

 

When a crazy bastard said he would live like that, how could he stop him?

 

* * *

 

As much as her heart had been frustrated, her hands quickly created words.

 

‘Even though they’re not children, they act like children.’

 

“The Princes acted like that?”

 

After resolutely leaving Wilhelm Hall and meeting Kalian and Plants at Chermil Palace, Hina confided her feelings to Kyrie as if acting spoiled. She was an older sister to Veronica and Dmirea, and an older sister to Kalian and Plants, but only to Kyrie was she a younger sibling.

 

‘They set my boundaries and think that worrying about me as they think is for my sake. Both of them think only that way. They rather treat me like a child. I didn’t like that.’

 

“So you told them not to do that?’

 

‘Yes. So I told them not to think that way. I told them I have things I can do.”

 

“Good. You did well.”

 

He did not say they acted that way because they worried about her, or that it was all said for her sake. He unconditionally took Hina’s side and only listened to her. Though he knew there were reasons for it all, he did not tell her that and ask her to understand. Since the day the blueberries turned blue, Kyrie had always been like this.

 

After bravely saying what she had to say in front of the two Princes and coming back upset even by that and telling Kyrie such things, he knew there was no need to try to teach Hina by adding his own thoughts. If it was not a story Hina was asking because she did not know, he just needed to listen.

 

After having such a pleasant conversation and taking Hina to Wilhelm Hall, Arsene had a half-dead look on his face.

 

“Lord Bern, do you happen to know where the Prince, who is the Deputy Commander, or the Deputy Commander, who is the Prince, is right now and what he is doing? I’m so busy right now that I’m about to sell even my lifeline, but the His Highness Deputy Commander simply won’t come.”

 

Like this, he asked about Plants’s whereabouts. So he conveyed the answer that he was currently conversing with Prince Kalian.

 

“Ah. I see. Thanks for letting me know.”

 

At these words, Arsene, who had looked truly half-dead, very cleanly gave up looking for Plants and went back to work.

 

He seemed to have been wearing the same clothes for several days, but since Mages were always so clean, it was hard to tell, so Kyrie just lost interest. His under-eyes were always dark anyway, so today too, he would just fall asleep or faint or die or do something well on his own.

 

After that, having nothing particular to do, he returned to Chermil again. Because his personal training time had noticeably decreased, he trained whenever he had spare moments.

 

“Kyrie.”

 

As he entered the training ground, there was someone who called Kyrie in a welcoming voice.

 

It was Kalian.

 

Despite coming to the training ground at such a time and seeing Kyrie, Kalian had not drawn his sword and remained sitting on the training ground floor. It meant he had not come to spar or oversee Kyrie’s sword.

 

“Is something the matter?”

 

The small sound of breathing as he sat there was the same as usual, yet somehow different. He was not someone who would be disheveled like this just because he was scolded by Hina.

 

“Whether there’s something or nothing. It’s not that there’s something, but it’s not that there’s nothing either. It’s difficult.”

 

The sound of laughter wavered subtly.

 

What hung at the end of that laughter also hurt.

 

So Kyrie did not ask anything else and walked toward where Kalian was.

 

Not for sparring, not for teaching, not for conversation.

 

He just knew that Kalian had come because he needed Kyrie’s back. He did not know whether it was the current Kyrie or not, but he knew he had come because he needed somewhere to lean.

 

Kyrie, who walked step by step toward Kalian, sat down with a thud beside him.

 

“I will listen.”

 

He could not carry him on his back since he could not drink alcohol, and there was no fight so he could not show his back. His ears that always listened well were always the same, so he could always hear Kalian’s voice.

 

As expected, Kyrie.

 

Kalian, who spoke as if letting it flow away, grinned.

 

“You know, and Master knows. The Crown Prince of Secritia… Crown Prince Chase also knows.”

 

And then he put forth words that were rambling yet consistently precious and painful.

 

“But my older brother doesn’t know. Because I didn’t tell him, he says he can’t hear that name. I knew it would be like that. I knew it so I was fine, but because I knew it, I thought I would be fine, so I went ahead and confirmed it.”

 

He spoke of how the name that would not be conveyed unless Kalian told it with his own mouth or someone directly remembered it—the name of one who should be forgotten—was truly being erased by Serenty, and that he had deliberately gone ahead and confirmed this fact.

 

Kyrie, who never took any single word lightly, just listened without saying a word.

 

“Should I write it large and post it in front of the Royal Palace like Master said? If I write it and post it, won’t they forget? Will they remember and acknowledge it? I thought. But still, I shouldn’t do that, I thought. Since everyone knows anyway, should I try it once? I thought. If I do that, will Master scold me? Will Syspanian also not understand just this once? I thought. Just… while doing that.”

 

That voice that sounded like the wind yet like flowing water, about that one person’s name being forgotten, he listened to it all as it flowed away.

 

“I was fine because I knew it. But thinking about it, I’m a bit not fine. Thinking about what I should do. Thinking about what I should do. Not knowing what I should do. And so having nowhere to go.”

 

He listened as it flowed away as if hearing the sound of wind.

 

He listened as it flowed away as if hearing the sound of flowing water.

 

“So I’m just here briefly, planning to stay a bit.”

 

Every word, every small sound of breath, he listened while remembering it all as if letting it flow away.

 

Because he had sworn not to let it be forgotten this time.

 

“Please do so. It’s fine to stay here for a while.”

 

Since he had already kept the oath of the past, he resolved to certainly keep this promise as well.